“One of the things about getting older is that I just can’t persecute myself with quite the same level of enthusiasm.” ~ no idea if or where I read this but I’ll try to fit it into the book
I first heard the phrase “how you do anything is how you do everything” in a class on entrepreneurship (mostly sales) I took with T. Harv (author of Secrets of the Millionaire Mind) back when I owned my own biz. He got it from zen-light author Cheri Huber. This was back when Harv was pretty much just starting out his seminar business and he traveled for free from city to city thanks to his wife being an airline attendant with WestJet I believe. I’m pretty sure I was taking that course in ’98 and he was in the process of writing above book – which, curiously enough considering that Harv seemed very self-disciplined, didn’t get published until 2005. IIRC, he was having a hard time of it.
The saying, of course, relates to personality and character. It’s been a problem for me for like forever that I take very seriously doing a good job when I work but can either be an extremely hard worker – or sometimes be a slacker – on my personal projects. It depends on whether I feel very convinced that they’re the right thing to do. This is typical Rubin-esque Questioner behavior (with slight rebel tendencies). I haven’t read the book since I got the gist from her blog and pretty much know my tendencies and what works for me now. I would recommend The Power of Habit (Charles Duhigg) and Kelly McGonigal’s book: The Willpower Instinct if you’re interested in building better habits. Sometimes these “one size fits all” prescriptions like external accountability may not work for particular people – for the most part, EX-ternal accountability doesn’t work for me at all and in fact, backfires since it sends off a knee jerk “you’re not the boss of me” reaction. IN-ternal accountability is HUGE for me though. It’s like how you will read about latte-type savings methods and think “OMG, I can’t fathom how people are even tempted to spend all the money they make!” BTW, I’m also learning a lot about myself and what works and why by observing my son who is almost exactly like me. There’s a plug for why INTJ’s should have kids even though they don’t like taking care of other people (besides the fact that they’re enjoyable to have around most of the time). Chances are fairly good you’ll get one that’s just like you and you won’t feel so out of sync with the world sometimes.
With my last post – eek! – 3 weeks ago, I was trying to figure out how to better juggle working and writing. The uber-focus of something like nanowrimo, extremist saving tactics or draconian diet and exercise regimens isn’t something I enjoy doing anymore now that I’m older and gravitate more towards regular habits rather than wild sprints to a finish line. I like slowing down and enjoying the journey more now. What has been working for me and has been very enjoyable, has been working on overall global structure and brainstorming scenes during the week (what I call “studying”) and doing a 10k (words, not kilometers) about once a month. And then came the layoffs…
I’ve spent the last couple of weekends revising resumes. Not mine. My resume is like ten years out of date. Hitting up my network for other people. Only two people haven’t found new jobs within the last two weeks. One is a rebel that went a bit postal and burnt more than a few bridges on the (early – as in walked out) way out the door. The other doesn’t have any specific skills and didn’t actually report to me anyway. She got the job through nepotism so she can find the next one the same way IMO.
The rebel was the poster woman for that Congreve quote: “Heaven has no rage like love to hatred turned. Nor hell a fury like a woman scorned.”
Seriously. Get your caring from your kids, your pets, friends, your s.o. – someone – but don’t expect it from men at work. Especially engineers.
Was I laid off? No. But things won’t be as fun for a variety of reasons. So I’m going to engineer things to lay myself off sometime around mid July. I’m good at making people redundant – including myself. And I really don’t like working in the summer anyway. I do like working when it gets cold – and I start feeling lonely for the fun of working with smart people on difficult projects at about the 4 month off mark. Plus then I can do a 5k once or twice a week! I figure I need at least 15 more weeks to finish the rough draft since I went down a wrong path and had to throw a bunch out. And even hike a 10k too if I want. Except my hiking companion (the dog) is getting old and what used to be fun for him is probably just persecution now. I’m probably the only person on the trails that uses their fitbit to ensure they don’t do too much just like I use my calendar to ensure I don’t pack too much in. Sometimes it’s better to fade away than burn out…
Oh, in terms of finances: Never thought I’d do this, but with the money from this contract, I’ve set up some laddered cashable GIC’s. It was just accumulating when this investment manager called me to ask what I planned to do with this stupidly large cash balance (that I didn’t want to invest in this market). In about a year or so I’ll look at switching it into shorter term individual bonds.
Weirdest thing that I read this week that stimulated an “outrage pr0n” reaction: Some guy set up a kickstarter campaign to fund a patronage for him to do nothing – some kind of thing where people donate so he doesn’t have to work at a (gasp! – I’m sure it must be soul sucking after like 2 years) job. I don’t think he was even producing anything. Sounds like lazy panhandling to me. I’ll stick with my dividends. Am grateful that my kids are both super hard workers and not entitled loafers and know how to save. Although they do both enjoy it a little too much. Oh well, they’re young.